I am willing to admit up front that this post is ridiculous, but that doesn't make it any less real.
Last night I cried, no, sobbed myself to sleep. When I told my husband this today he immediately said 'What did I do? Was it bad?' but this time he was in the clear. I cried over the beautiful baby across the hall. He turned two this past weekend, and while I love this stage in his life his birthday was just a reminder that I can't stop time and keep him here forever. One day some girl is going to take my sweet baby away from me, and there will be very little I can do to but smile for the photos and wave as they drive away. I told you this was going to be ridiculous! All I want, and I'm sure all any mother wants for her children is for them to love and be loved and if he finds himself crazy about some wonderful, godly woman I should be, and will be eventually, thrilled beyond belief. For now though, the thought is terryifing! In between my tears and sobs I began to pray for her last night. I don't even know that she is born! But the Lord knows her and I have to trust the Father's instincts on this and quiet the mother's worries. I pray that this girl understands what a precious piece of our lives she'll be responsible for. I pray that she loves the Lord and encourages him to do the same. One day (eek!) I pray that they'll have children that follow in their footsteps and come to know and love Christ. I pray that I will love her and treat her with the respect I would want. More than that, I pray that I like her and that she'll feel comfortable with me not just as her in-law, but as a friend. I trust the Lord will show her to my sweet boy when it is time, and even though I know there will be many tears shed on this end there will also be a whole new person to love. I pray that I will be up for the challenge! I will love the person my son finds worthy of his love. I know I will. But for now, I will relish in every precious and not-so-perfect moment that we have together.
"A daughter's a daughter for all of her live, but a son's a son until he takes a wife."
Is it wrong I want her to be an orphan?
